2012
The year we all anticipated, the year we hoped for change, it has gone and we begin a new era, a new year.
The year 2012 brought joy to some and sorrow to others, we lost our loved ones in death, lost our friends because of our jealousy and insecurity, lost our humanity by killing our fellow humans like animals, lost our roads and produce to violent storms, we lost a part of our economy.
The year began with the fuel subsidy strike all over the country, our economy was practically on pause, and so was education. So many lives were lost due to the riots, prices of commodities skyrocketed making life harder for the common man. Transportation also became an issue. On the lighter side, Nigerians always find ways to amuse themselves even in the midst of a disaster. They made funny pictures and jokes.
Churches were rendered unsafe by Boko haram extremists who bombed several churches, so many lives were lost. While we were getting over these tragedies came another, Dana air plane crashed and fell over some buildings in Lagos state killing a large number of people.
Several fatal road accidents took place. As a matter of fact, I personally lost a close friend in a fatal accident, so many videos circulated containing the aftermath of some of these accidents, I cried after watching these videos.
Another disaster that hit us is the release of two singles by a musician whom I shall not name but I think you know who he or she is (poko). The singles destroyed so many phone speakers, ear drums; the punishment of listening to the song changed some delinquent children for the better . Let's take a minute of silence for these phones that were destroyed.
A new style of dancing was added to our culture courtesy of p square called alingo, I can't do the dance it but I heard energy is needed to do so, we also heard of gangnam style.
The country was shaken by yet another tragedy, 4 young men were gruesomely murdered in broad daylight, this occurred only a few months after students were killed in Mubi by unknown men.
Rain storms came late in the year and displaced so many people from their homes, even our roads were rendered useless b the storms. In several states, babies were found in lakes and creeks dead, when some women will give their lives to experience motherhood.
Throughout the year we lost something and gained something as well but after all that has been said, if you're reading this post, you should be grateful that you are alive to see the end of the year, for so many have fallen along the way, instead of complaining about what we didn't achieve, we should be grateful that we have tomorrow to try again, some people never got this chance. We should be grateful for the friends we have, for the family who support us, for the air we breathe.
I wish to thank you for reading my posts in the past months and I pray God grants you long life and prosperity and most importantly, peace of mind. GOD BLESS YOU………….



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LE WAIST

Once upon a time, there lived a beautiful princess who called IVONNE. She came from a kingdom called GHANIA. She was loved and respected by all her subjects and even strangers loved her as well. ivonne travelled to the kingdom next to hers named NIGELIA and that was where she met a young prince called IYANA, they immediately fell for each other and planned their happily ever after ……..until a queen from the land of Nigelia came to hear about their love.
Queen TUTU was an arrogant queen who didn't care about the suffering she inflicted on her people, whenever her subjects complained about her outrageous taxes, she would reply "the road to succezz is a long one, my city must be the best among the restzz" *holds laff*. She was very lonely because she was too proud to pick a man from her kingdom, her advisers always brought young men for her to choose from, but she would often find fault in most of them "hezz not sexyzz #poko". The advisers planned to take her out of the kingdom and hoped she would meet a man to help her rule the kingdom.
She was invited to a ball in a nearby city, so she prepared and took a few of her advisers. She went to the ball in a short gown which was extremely revealing, as she was fair in complexion, all her royal markings (tattoos) were exposed. She walked into the ball room shining her eyeballs, and that was when she saw him. Prince iyana, he wore a tight shirt which revealed his body build and a tight trouser as well, she was already seeing herself with this unknown hunk. And out of nowhere, a woman holds this young man and they move together into the ball room. The queen was furious; she quickly called her aides to inquire about this young lady.
She was unsettled and kept staring at the couple, prince iyana took his beautiful princess and headed for the dance floor where he sang to her his true intentions "your waist, your waist, all I want is your waist" she smiled. At this point, the queen told her aides "I wantzz hizz waistzz, I must have it" they assured her that they will get his waist for her. The prince was pressed and left his princess for a few minutes to relieve himself. When he entered the men's room, he saw the queen, staring at him with wide eyes. 'HI" she said to him as she believed she shouldn't be shy to say hi*holds laff* "I like you, you know that right" the prince replied "am sorry, but i LOVE TRULY and presently I love princess ivonne, I can't hurt her " the queen replied "justzz tell her ITZ OVA as I am CRAZICALLY FIT' to be your queen' she came closer to him and put his hand on her waist and whispered in his ears "don't you wantzz this waist? It's all yours"
The prince was sweating heavily, his heartbeat went up and down like KUKERE, he couldn't hold it in anymore, he gave her a long French/ Chinese kiss, before he could run any more shows, the door opened and they quickly separated and went their separate ways. On getting back to his princess (after over 30 mins) she looked at him in disappointment and asked where he went, he said he took a stroll to get fresh air. She saw the red lipstick on his lips (as queen tutu was famous for using blood red lipstick) and was hurt deep down; her fairy tale was coming to an end. She didn't want to believe her prince was cheating on her; she looked around the ball room and the only person with thick red lipstick was queen tutu.
I think you already know how the story ends :D. the prince left his princess for the queen, sad though, but it teaches us so many things, if it's meant to be, it will be, you don't have to push it, everybody's prince will come, you just have to b e patient.
This story bears no resemblance to any person living or dead, it is purely fiction. If you link it to any person, you do so at your own risk :D. Hope you enjoyed the story, have a lovely weekend #POKO

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WIFE MATERIAL, 40 YARDS

         Today, we discuss the shortage of wife materials in the country, this is indeed an epidemic. First, let’s discuss the qualities of a wife material. I came about these qualities by examining my mother and four other wives, first of all (go down low) a wife material must be a patient woman, she patiently waits by her husband in all situations, thus helping to build him up, secondly, a wife material is understanding and must communicate well to avoid misunderstandings even if we know they are inevitable. A wife material must also be independent, in the sense that she can cater for the family in the absence of the man, she shouldn’t have to depend on him for every little thing, and she finds ways to support her home.

        I just gave you the emotional aspects of the qualities of a wife material; now let’s examine the physical capabilities. A wife material must be an excellent cook. As the old saying goes; ‘the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach’. I totally agree with this. A wife material learns different dishes and perfects them so as to keep her man interested. 

       A wife material must also know how to keep her home neat and tidy. Being a pig is not an option -_-. As they say ‘cleanness is next to Godliness”. Keeping the home tidy also prevents outbreak of diseases.

     A wife material must be an ambassador of peace and balance. An ambassador of peace in a way that, she should not incite her man to fight but calm him down and also balance because she must allow him to have his normal routine with his friends and family balanced with his marriage or relationship. No wife material will separate you with your family and friends; instead she helps seal the bond.

    Over the years, ladies have believed that sex bonds the relationship, and that when you always have sex with the man, he will never leave you. But my dear ladies, you are wrong. Sex bonds the relationship yes, but it does not fix any problems therein. As they say ‘sex will not make him love you and a baby won’t make him stay’ so be smart and put in the right effort, no man has a right to your body until he pays your bride price, so don’t turn into a sex slave for someone and miss out on finding your divine husband.

     Nobody is born as a wife material. So anybody can be a wife material. You just have to calm down, it’s not too late to learn how to act, cook , speak, and I assure you, you will attract the type of men you desire, I mean lets be serious, no responsible man will want to spend the rest of his life with a lobatian, who smokes, drinks more than a whale, can’t cook, cant behave in public, nags, complains, wastes money, tattooed from head to toe and is a perpetual liar -_-

      Ladies, we need to step up our game, because we will raise the next generation, let’s not mess them up. Have a lovely day.

ARSENAL OH ARSE_ENAL

 When i was a fan of Arsenal F.C, dont scream okay i still love arsenal okay...Infact i call them the team after my heart, well they are the team after my mouth now...But if not for a few reasons after the sale of Van persie & song...they'd be the team after my ass... Yeah i would'nt be beefing those other fans dat call us Ass-anal...thanks to Wenger 4 turning my club into a religion... You know why? he messed with the imposible.(go unbeaten) now the imposible is messing with him!!!​!. His ideas ran into favouritism & wack tactics after his unbeaten season that tommorow he would'nt mind allowing van persie's 7 year old son play. At least he got van persie blood, thats whats called Faith... Like seriously? what is he? a pastor? Or why did he sign him?(maybe he thought it would make van persie stay)
If you believe I'm wrong check this out... Since that season every single player wenger has bought is like an ex player he has lost! Not to retirement but transfer...EVERY TIME he looks at Diaby he says to himself "i saw veira in this guy at least they are both from france". when we had van persie he was seeing a faster,smarter and maybe more effective Denis Bergkamp...(at least Bergkamp stayed till the end),he even calls theo walcott the second thierry henry. The funny thing here is that not only did he see them this way, he made us see them the way he does... Yea thats what Ars-ene has been doing...or maybe you too can help me ask another fan who vermaelen,gibbs,santos,giroud,podolski, etc play like and I bet you, he/she will not give it a second thought. And funny enough we pray they turn out either like 'them or better & hope they fix their eyes on the trophy...and that my people is faith. are we a club or bunch of heavenly race sprinting christians??. And now search facebook you'll find the true faithfuls... We aren't arsenal F.C WE ARE ARSENAL H.F (ARSENAL HAVE FAITH) some arsenal fans have so much faith they should have bin listed in Paul's faith account of Hebrews 13... (Forgive my bluntness) those who keep that poster "in arsene we trust" arent paid but have been made to believe that economic human... Is arsenal where to pratice your economic career? Assuming he managed mancity he'll give the sheiks back all the money mancity has spent during the period of mancini in a single year...(cant really say about the trophies) and in 5 years he would have his own green card._Man city should try it and they might just get 5 trophies in 3 season before the real arsene kicks in. Now most arsenal fans believe wenger more than the second coming of christ...IN THE LAST SEVEN YEARS, WINNING A TROPHY HAS BEEN HARDER THAN MANKIND TRYING TO PROVE THE EXISTENCE OF ALIENS.Its a good thing that Wenger is begining to lose the members of his church. Well, our neighbors have a totally different script quite opposite to ours, am coming up with it...
Please note; I'm not an arsenal fan(faithful) - I'm with the winning team(fcb) вυt these are the words of my "live soft die hard" arsenal faithful cousin....
Pls note also that Iђΐs is a write up of my assistant, @mr_yubi, I know nothing about football, but I hope u enjoyed the article, #okbye